Kodak Alaris has announced a new version of its Kodak Moments app. Or possibly written a new press release about its old Kodak Moments app. It’s hard to tell.
Press releases were initially aimed at communicating the features and benefits of a new product or service – with a positive spin, naturally. Readability was seen as a virtue. In recent years its been increasingly challenging to winkle out the salient facts from the breathless ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ and pompous overstatements of the PR people, but the latest effort from Kodak takes the cake – it’s an absolute corker! PhotoCounter is unable to tell you what, if anything, marks this version of Kodak Moments from the last. We do know, however, from store feedback, that the last version was frustrating for both customers and store staff.
– But don’t take our word for it that this is a leading contender to date for ‘Worst Marketing Communications (Single Item category) of 2016’.
Here is the full release in all its language-mangling, lily-gilding glory:
New Visual Storytelling Capabilities Elevate Photos to Memorable Moments
Kodak Alaris today introduces a new experience for consumers: visual storytelling that transforms important photos into rich stories worth sharing with the new Kodak Moments App.
The new Kodak Moments App offers narrative tools that will enhance photos with beautifully designed text, block quotes and more. Users are prompted to craft stories to elevate their photos into vibrant and meaningful moments and awaken the storyteller within everyone. Moments can be shared within the app, as printed images or more widely on any social network.
A recent Kodak Alaris survey of 760 US respondents who actively use social networking sites and apps showed that 65 percent of the participants feel that social media is ‘superficial’, and 64 percent voiced concerns about their family’s privacy on social media. The new Kodak Moments App is meant for a growing number of consumers who seek reprieve from the seemingly endless number of selfies, meaningless hashtags, and sponsored posts that saturate social networks today. The experience is also completely ad-free, ensuring one’s Kodak Moments App news feed is a place for the most memorable moments.
Noteworthy capabilities (note they don’t state they are ‘new capabilities’) of the Kodak Moments App include:
Captions: Tell thoughtful stories about important moments with tastefully designed text, layouts and dramatic block quotes;
Pictures: Turn powerful images into memorable moments with easy-to-use photo editing tools;
Sharing: Share moments safely and securely via the Kodak Moments App or as printed products. Stories can also be shared with wider audiences on social networks like Facebook, Twitter and more.
Inspiration: Follow like-minded people; see how they tell their stories and share their moments. Users get notifications whenever friends start to follow their Kodak Moments or have liked one of their Kodak Moments;
Storage: Your moments will be stored with original image quality, including high-resolution.
Ad Free: The experience is completely ad-free.
‘The Kodak Moments App is for people who want to tell their stories as a form of self-expression and identity. It’s for people who want their important photos to rise above the clutter and stand out by creating visual stories,’ said Nicki Zongrone, president of Kodak Alaris’ Imaging Consumer (sic!!) Division. ‘With the multi-dimensional storytelling capabilities of the Kodak Moments App, we bring the idea of Kodak Moments into the digital age, bridging the physical and digital ways that people share their memories.’
The (35-megabyte) Kodak Moments App is available now for download in the Apple App Store for iOS devices. Existing Kodak Moments App users can download the latest updates to enjoy new features. Kodak Moments App for Android will be available in spring 2016.
The Kodak Moments App also offers a simple way for users to wirelessly transfer images to a Kodak Picture Kiosk and create prints, greeting cards, collages, photo books and more.
And accompanying the awful press release came news of this failed and no doubt hugely expensive launch event:
Experience the KODAK MOMENTS App at SXSW 2016
For those attending SXSW 2016, Kodak Alaris has partnered with famed artist Marcos Lutyens to create a physical manifestation of the Kodak Moments App called ‘The Memory Observatory.’ The interactive installation will debut on March 12 at the Austin Convention Center, bringing to life the new app’s unique capabilities: making moments more memorable, sharing moments in a safe space, and keeping artifacts of your moments so they can live on. Visitors will have the opportunity to transform a favourite photo into a journey of senses from colour, to sound and smell. For more information about ‘The Memory Observatory’, visit: http://www.kodakmoments.com/memory